Friends, Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider started writing these books frustrated like many of us, sick and tired of how some women easily find and keep love while others who are genuine good people can’t seem to get it and keep it very long. After researching and watching girls who just “got it” they came up with a set of rules to follow to help the rest of us clueless types figure it all out. Sure they are by no means perfect themselves and I know at least one of the authors suffered a divorce. However the fundamental principles in the book I find are still valid. The truth is many of us are failing at love because we are in fact TOO NICE. Doing too much, being too available, etc. will kill a new budding relationship before it starts. This book is particularly valuable to younger women who, thanks to hormones, are more prone to be obsessive and compulsive when it comes to love and relationships.

I think they really hit the nail on the head when they talk about looking at yourself and what you have to offer a man. If you are needy, depressed, unkempt, and constantly questioning your relationship who would want to deal with that? There are so many other people out there that are EASY to be with. If you’re not one of them, it’s time to learn how to be.

The rules seem harsh at first. Don’t talk too long, don’t call, don’t do this and don’t do that. It seems like a big adolescent game. But the fact is that either you are the girl who is really too busy to worry about what and where your guy is and just fun to be with when you both have time and can hang out or you are the girl who needs these books. Sorry to say.

Like most of us, I accidentally almost alway do the rules with guy I have no interest in. I never go out of my way for them, I don’t call them, I end conversations quickly, but I’m polite and in a good mood. So when they turn out to be stalking me down the line or obsessed with me later, I step back and wonder what I must have done to give them hope. I didn’t. Sadly sometimes that’s all it takes.

Critics of this book are many. But these critics are probably already in long tern happy loving relationships (or in denial). Once you’re in a loving long term relationship you really don’t need to keep to the rules as much. Just make sure that you are still being the type of person that’s easy to be and live with and not a chore. That’s decent and sound advice if I say so myself.

Are there other books that I think are better…yes! But this is a great starting out point for the more obsessive and over analyzing types out there. If you spend a lot of time worrying about why a guy did this or wondering why your less attractive friend is surrounded by guys and you’re not, you need this book.

Four Stars! ****

Feel free to email me any stories you wish you share of your dating adventures. Ask for advice or just rant!
Kat@PersianKittyKat.com